I feel so unfocused today, but more so like I have been dumped into a desert wasteland. I arrived at work to find a parking lot full of cars and nobody around. As I continued my walk, the new rain had just quited the atmosphere, and until I walked into my small building of work I did not see a single soul. It was like Abre los Ojos or four my American Friends, Vanilla Sky. And suddenly I thought maybe the world did end. (I will talk about this fear later). As I continued through the day I see to be surrounded by the dead bodies of other unfocused travelers. The only time I was witness to a group of semi animate persons was as I was walking past the Smokers lounge to drop off a parcel. I had never seen that many people outside, most of whom I knew. So many of them, as if they couldn't go anywhere without a large group, which supportted my subconscience thought that the Godot bomb had dropped and we were all alone.
This of course was not the case. I wished that sometimes I could shut off my life, the world, and others for a short time. My night of rest turned into restlessness. I can't sleep when I need to resolve an issue. Last night I needed to. But due to both of us not having the time, we decided that today would be better to meet or to talk over the telly. I am glad we will shed some light on this and hopefully find a resolution that will bring us both honor.
To continue down my spiral of the end of the world. I am sitting at my desk and all the way on the other side of the building sits this guy who comes and talks to me at times. Not talked to as in, "do you want to have a cup of coffee," but just hangs around from time to time. He is very cute and sweet. He is sipping his cofffe talking with his friend. His friend is hidden behind a pller so it looks as if he is in a panto with light laughter underscoring his motions. In between us is a cavernous stairwell, whose sides are cut off by the door. So, it looks as if there is a pit between us. Two men seperated by a bottomless pit, not being able to reach the other. This might just be the start of my next play. Ha. He's a cutie, but who knows. I have other things to think about right now.
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